reading helter skelter

Sunday, August 20, 2006

I'm tired.

Breathless and feeling that all this just don't make sense anymore.

We keep telling ourselves to keep smiling, to keep searching,

But at the end of the day, i'm just empty.

What's the use of "being there" and getting all the things i "so deserve to get"

When at the end you just look back and go, "hey, i'm not doing this in my work today."

Could have spent my time doing something more worthwhile,

Something that perhaps would make me happier,

Vocationalist? companionship? migration?

Perhaps, but a greater power saw me through to a path of the knowledged.

For that, eternally grateful i will ever be,

But sometimes, in times like THIS,

When everything seems so colourful, and you're the only black and white,

You just wonder, was this really correct?

Is this really what i am?

Somehow, you want to let others know that you need comfort, for you are saddened and weak,

But then you see yourself as a pillar of strength for others,

And for the reasons of not wanting to let them down or discourage them,

You play a strong front, keeping silent, hoping someone, somehow can tell,

Letting the pain and the sorrow eat you up inside.

Sometimes, true eyes do see,

And pick you up from whence you fall,

But sometimes, in your darkest and deepest world of monochrome sorrows,

You realise, with great saddness and anguish,

That theirs still has colour,

And, not wanting to taint the already joyous and colourful picture before you,

You slip back into the shadows, letting tears drown you inside,

And dream.

-lamantations of a boy in monochorome.

20.09.06

post by joshua at 4:19 AM (x)

Being Joshua.
Undoubtably Joshua
SAX. JAZZ. ALL THAT SORT.
REROUTES.
Tigress Jane
Mr."CHIP" Weijie
CFC.(char.)
Carissa's Catastrophe
Nattie Chocolate
Chua Suyin.Cat chua
Alston

RE-REROUTES
My collage @ FLICKR
Sam Ryo's collage @ FLICKR
old friendster blog.

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skin design by GJ

also, kudos to Jane.


cheers.